October 26, 2009

ltml - October 26

Dear I'm going to blog at least once a week me,
You suck at this and have nothing to say. That's all.
Sincerely,
Me that forgets or has nothing to say

Dear beautiful wonderful amazing niece,
Quit growing up so quickly...18...wow, 8 frickin teen! I remember watching movies and sledding with you. I remember you and k-bug following me around. I remember you begging the g-parents to let you tag along to my basketball games and watch me cheer. I remember little you with you little cherub face and your little sweet way of kicking my ass at cards. I remember everything. I love you and now I think I will have to dedicate a post solely to you.
Love love love,
The luckiest aunt in the whole wide world

**side note...I know schmoopy (as LiLu puts it), but I can't help myself

Dear tree in my back yard,
I can't wait until the condo association gets enough money to cut you down. You are leafing in my porch and I am sick of sweeping. On the other hand, at least you provide me some comic relief by deciding to send half of it across the street to A and the girls. Funny as hell!
Sincerely,
You're annoying

Dear A,
Have fun raking those leaves!!! HAHAHAHAHA!
Love,
Your bitch neighbor with the big leafy fucking tree

Dear BFF,
You do too have insurance...maybe not health, but you have car and home owners. I was right...AGAIN - even if it was just a technicality.
Sincerely,
quit being crabby it was a joke

Dear clients,
Once again - a reminder - I HATE you, but you are the reason I get a paycheck. I do not, however, want to hear your life story. I've heard it all before. Unless you have a sex tape shocker I do NOT care. Oh wait, I don't care about that either, been there heard that.
Sincerely,
Disgruntled answerer of the phones...

Dear Remote Start,
I love you. I can't believe it took almost 10 years of parking outside in the snow to finally get you.
Loving,
The non-window scraper

Dear readers,
Thanks again. BTW - we're still on for the free booze if you make it to good ol' Montana.
Thanks a million,
J

3 comments:

Travis said...

I'm headed that way. I could use a drink.

Fuck leaves. That's real.

LiLu said...

There's nothing wrong with a little schmoop, every now and then. ;-)

Stacy & Matthew said...

Loving your blogs!