you ever know someone that has had to fight for their rights? I have. I've known a lot of people. As a matter of fact I have a few very close friends that fight for their rights EVERY.SINGLE.DAY...It's call the "gay community". Those of you that have read my other stuff or know me personally know that a) my mother is a lesbian b) I am an activist for equal rights...for not only "the gays" (thanks Kathy Griffin for making me think that's funny) but for everyone c) that I can be very passionate about doing what right and d) that I have a very strong sense of what mom calls "social justice". There are a lot of things in my life that I am proud of, but my ability to seek the truth, try to turn people toward what I feel in my heart and soul is right, and doing my job as a human being to understand that our differences make us special are my biggest accomplishments.
That being said. I am straight...mostly...we think :) haha - my peeps will get that (insert a joke about one of my many "girlfriends" here). I do, however, try to keep up to date on the happenings here in the local "gay community" as well as globally. I'm informed ya'll. So I have a friend, who is a teacher (will call her A), somewhere in the state of MT. Her "partner" (gonna call her B) and I are tight dude...she's like the freakin' shit. I'd also like to add that this couple is the first "gay couple" to adopt JOINTLY in the state. That's right kiddies. These 2 moms are both on the birth certificate. Wrap your mind around it....because we are a RED state... Anyway, I digress, so this friend, B informed me today that A, her teacher "partner" (sorry for no names, but it's not my place) was denied bereavement leave for her (B) father's funeral. This woman is not just B's "partner" but her sons parent. Legally this is A's son's grandfather, regardless of their sexual orientation. Now another party involved is going to be called C. C is also a lesbonin (haha - "Friends" reference...remember that episode? thanks Pister for that reminder). As a matter of fact, C has had to fight for her own rights (again, can't really get into it). C had decided that because of a certain (bullshit excuse) extenuating circumstance she will not help A & B fight for A's rights as a parent and sent her to deal with her bereavement leave with the "higher ups". EVEN after A & B helped her fight for hers....hmmmmm...so it's okay when others are helping you, but when it's time to fight for a global cause now that you're fate has been decided to puss out? Nope...not cool man...
That being said...I think I'd like to express my opinion on C's stance...
You cannot have your cake and eat it too. If you are NOT willing to stand up for your own rights as a gay person don't expect anyone else to either. It has never been easy standing up for what one believes. HOWEVER, what's right is not always easy and what's easy is not always right. These people stood up for you because it was the right thing to do. You now have a choice...do what is right or stick your head in the sand because you are afraid of the repercussions. If you decide not to do what is right above what is safest for yourself don't expect people to stick around. People want friends who are willing to put themselves out there if it's the right thing to do. It is all out chicken shit for you to take the help when it is offered and yet when the tables are turned to run like a scared little puppy with your tail between your legs. I understand that in your job position it is hard to do the right thing. I understand that there could be very big consequences. I understand that it could be very hard to deal with. I would like to remind you though...When you needed the support the most for circumstances that were much harder to deal with...these people were there. They took you in as family. They gave you not only a place to stay, but more importantly their hearts. They expected nothing in return (to a point because frankly when you have friends you do expect some relationship reciprocation...if you say you don't it's a fucking lie). They did expect for you to treat them with dignity and respect and to maybe be willing to help them fight for not only their rights, but YOURS. Put yourself in their shoes. If your father died and your "partner" and parent of your child was told that she could not have bereavement time would you be okay with that or would if piss you off? I know you. I know it would piss you off. What I'm really saying here is grow a fucking set and fight for what's right! Don't piss all over your friends because you're current partner is having issues with an ex...DUDE who the fuck is going to be there if and when shit falls apart during this relationship? Certainly not the person that's walking away.
Moral of the story kids: fight for what you believe in or stfu...you can't have it both ways...if you do have it both ways then you are just a FLAKE. Nobody wants to hang with a flake because you are like your friends or you become like them...If the world is going to change the way you want it to then you have to be willing to make sure it does so...
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